The world seems obsessed with the G-spot. Sigmund Freud, who founded psychoanalysis, saw G-spot orgasms as more mature than clitoral orgasms. Modern magazine covers and websites promise to help you find your G-spot and unlock its secrets–including squirting and ejaculation–to have the best sex life possible. Yet other people deny the existence of the G-spot entirely. So does the G-spot exist and, if so, what is it?
The G-spot isn’t a myth.
That doesn’t mean that the G-spot is a distinct organ, however. Research has failed to identify the G-spot as a structure in the human body.
Instead, the G-spot is an area where the clitoral organ can be stimulated through the vaginal wall. Now, if you’re like most people, you probably think of the clitoris as a small bit of nerve-rich tissue near the vaginal opening. But that’s only part of the clitoris! The entire structure continues deeper into the body, surrounding the vagina!
When you’re aroused, your clitoris swells. But it isn’t just the visible clitoral head. The internal part of the clitoris swells, which results in pressure on the vagina and urethra. This is why you find it challenging to locate or pleasure your G-spot when you’re not fully aroused–and why arousal can sometimes make you feel like you need to pee.
So the G-spot is actually the clitoris, which means Freud’s theory that vaginal orgasms are somehow better or “more mature” than clitoral ones is a load of bunk! It doesn’t help anyone to shame any orgasm. Pleasure is pleasure, after all!
That doesn’t mean you should give up the quest for G-spot orgasms (or the squirting they can cause) if they sound fun to you. But if you’ve tried and tried to no avail, there’s no reason to beat yourself up. Instead, focus on the wonderful things you know that your body can do and the many ways you can experience pleasure!
Of course, that might be difficult for some people because…
The G-spot might not always be in the same spot.
If you’re on a quest to find your G-spot–or any of the pleasurable spots in the vagina–you’ve probably learned that it’s usually located a couple of inches inside the front wall of the vagina. While that’s true for most people, it’s not true for everyone.
In fact, some people report that their G-spot “moves!” It makes sense that your clitoris doesn’t always swell in exactly the same way or amount so that you might find pleasurable spots in different parts of your vagina.
Getting the Most Out of G-Spot Stimulation
Aside from ensuring you’re plenty aroused to make finding and pleasuring your G-spot easier, experimenting with position can make a difference. Try lying on your back, front, or sitting. Bend your knees and pull them toward your chest, which can shift your G-spot position.
There’s more than one G-spot stimulation technique to consider, too. The traditional advice to use “come hither fingers creates a back-and-forth sensation. But some people also like dragging toys or penises across their G-spots to create a milking sensation. You or your partner can also try walking your fingers across your G-spot.
Because your G-spot is really the clitoris, simultaneous G-spot and clitoral stimulation might feel better than either clitoral or G-spot stimulation alone. Rabbit vibrators, for example, were designed to hit both at the same time, and Cirilla’s customers have given 5-star reviews to several:
●B Yours Beginner's Bunny Vibrator
●INA 3 G-Spot and Clitoral Vibrator by LELO
●Bunny Buddy Realistic Dual Silicone Vibrator
Not everyone loves rabbits, however. Because anatomy differs from person to person, some people find that the external arm might be too short to reach their clitoris. A flexible toy might help here.
Rabbits aren’t your only option for dual stimulation, though. You could try the Lelo Enigma, Gvibe Mini Vibrator, or even the We-Vibe Unite 2.0, which you can wear during intercourse, for simultaneous internal and external stimulation. Try rocking the toy in and out of your vagina for more intense sensations. Of course, you can always use two toys (one could be a G-spot dildo) at once if that feels good to you.
Some people also like when a hand is placed on their mons pubis during intercourse or when being penetrated by a toy or fingers. That’s the area of fatty tissue above the pubic bone that grows pubic hair. By pressing on your G-spot from the inside and outside at the same time, you may be able to give your pleasure a boost!
And if you can’t find your G-spot, don’t like how stimulating it feels, or can’t orgasm or squirt from G-spot play, don’t stress. None of that is required to have a good time during sex, whether you’re solo or with a partner. Sex shouldn’t be stressful, goal-oriented, or hinged on a single type of orgasm or play. Instead, it should be fun, relaxing, and exploratory. And if learning what the G-spot really is helps, then I’ve done my job!